Guilty or Not Guilty

I do believe that those people who have committed a crime should be punished. However, I do not believe that people who choose to do things that society may deem "wrong" should be punished. Excluding the things that society point out to be "wrong" such as to murder, steal, etc.. I don't think that people should be punished for choosing to do things differently In today's world, society does not really have any clue what is really right or wrong anymore. We, as a society, have somehow lost our judgement of what is actually wrong and what is right. We tend to find it rather difficult to affectionate what is wrong from what is right or from what is really wrong to what we think is "wrong". One example would be politics; in the world of politics, there will always be corruption within a government - big or small.

But perhaps if I did believe that all those that have done things that society considered "wrong" should be punished, I would punish them according to how extreme, as well as how morally wrong their crimes are. If I were to punish a murderer, I wouldn't murder he/she right away. Depending on what their motives are at first, I wouldn't murder them right away. It's because there are those who have committed murder, not because their intentionI would at least give them a second chance -  a chance for them to reflect on what they have done and whether they feel any feeling of remorse or regret for what they have done, I don't think they should be murdered.The same would go for other criminals who have committed other crimes. I would have some kind of a therapy for criminals who are willing to change for the better.

Punishment is still punishment, thus I believe that prisons are necessary. The time served in prison will vary depending on how serious the crime is.Obviously, the person that murdered a person will serve a much longer time compared to someone who has been caught driving under the influence. Just because prisoners are getting second chances doesn't necessarily mean that they are free to go.  and are able to do what they want again. They are required to serve jail time. If not, then what kind of a punishment would that be?

Also, I don't necessarily believe that a person who has committed a number of crimes should serve a lifetime term in prison. What I would do is each person will get 3 strikes; after the 3 warning, I think that they should serve a much longer time than the one they've served before. The more that they commit crimes, the more they jail time they'll receive. Though I do believe that a person who has committed a number of murders should be in person for a lifetime. I don't think prisoners should be released earlier than their original release date because i think if you choose to do criminal acts and get caught, you should be ready to face whatever consequences will be given to you . There are no easy way out in life, there are certainly no easy way out in prison.

Wildcard: The Heart and Mind

Which is more powerful -- the mind or the heart? A lot of people ask this question many times; and sometimes, they cannot even differentiate the difference between the heart and the mind. To me, I believe that the heart is much, much more powerful than the mind. Why? Well, it’s really easy to change a mind as if I were to change a one’s heart. The thing that many people don’t realize is that the mind is constantly changing every single day, every hour, every second. The thoughts that we process into our minds goes through some kind of change like if we were to make a decision - we usually ask ourselves, “Should I go choose A or choose B.” Everytime we make a decision, people are always biased to one of the choices they’re given and that is most like because their heart tells them to.  Sure, some decision that we make in our everyday lives are not that important like what kind of breakfast to eat in the morning.  But then there are those decisions that we make in life that requires to use our heart, not to be cliche, but an example would be which person do love more when you’re stuck between two people that you love...

This somehow reminds me of music in a way. What I mean is that anyone and everyone can learn how to play an instrument, but if you don;t have the passion for it, it can only take so far. Not even the mind can improve a person’s ability to play the best they can and be the best that they can be. With passion that comes from the heart, if you have the passion for music, only you can truly improve and become the best at it.

I also believe that the heart is a lot stronger and powerful than the mind because of experiences that I’ve come through. There have been numerous times where I have fallen and failed at things that I love to do like dancing and playing tennis. I remember the time when I went and danced at an audition site. I was so nervous then. I kept telling myself to calm down. And when it was my turn to dance, all I could do was to do my very best. Though iin the end, I wasn’t able to go through the next round. However, it was my passion for dancing that keeps me motivated to be better -- to be the best and try my hardest next time around. It was my love for dancing that keeps me striving. No matter how many countless times my mind told me that i can’t do it, to just give up, and throw everything away; I didn’t listen cause I knew my heart wouldn’t. My heart didn’t want to give up and throw everything that I’ve worked hard for. My heart knew how important dancing is to me. And in the end, I chose to listen to my heart, it had a much powerful, positive impact on me than my mind did. To me, the heart has more control of someone than the mind does. Although there will be times in our life where we must decide to close out our hear and listen to what our minds are telling us. And I do applaud those who listens to their minds because they are able to push aside their heart and not let their emotions get in the way too much...

i like to pig out on...

when i think of it, i actually do have a comfort food that i love to eat. Peanut butter and jelly with a glass of milk is like the best thing ever. i can eat it almost every single day and i will never ever get tired of it. i know it's such a simple food, but that's what i love about it. whenever i'm feeling stressed about something, i start to crave some peanut butter and jelly; and of course, what's a pb&j without milk right? well for me, milk is a must when it comes to eating my pb&j sandwich. i refuse to eat it without milk, with the exception of Sunny D as a substitute. it just doesn't feel right or feel complete without milk. it's just one of my unusual habits i guess.

I'm not really sure why or how peanut butter and jelly sandwich with the milk on the side became my comfort food. i used to not like it. as a matter of fact, i used to find as peanut butter and jelly rather weird when i was first introduced to it. pb&j wasn't really a common thing in the philippines. we eat plain peanut butter sandwiches. jelly did not really exist and crunchy peanut butters did not come into existence to us. it was just plain old peanut butter sandwich. then one day, i was forced to try it because that was all there is to eat at lunch. i sort of did not like what was being served to us at lunch, so i chose to have pb&j for lunch instead. it was not really what i wanted for lunch, but i had no other choice. however, with just a bite, i was hooked on it; and from then on i started craving it. everytime i'm feeling depressed or stressed, i have to have some of my peanut butter and jelly sandwich with milk on the side.

it's comfort food for me because first of all, it is very easy to make. i don't need to go out of my way and buy all these ridiculous amount of ingredients just to make it. all that's needed are bread, peanut butter, jelly, and milk. whenever i take a bite of the sandwich, i just start to calm down and helps me forget about the things i stress about or even my problems in life. usually, girls would eat ice cream when they're crying or depressed; but i eat pb&j with milk. i don't just eat pb&j whenever i'm stressed or feeling down, i actually it just out of nowhere. once my cravings for for food kicks in  when i'm at home doing particularly nothing, pb&j always comes to my mind first. of course, i don't always pick to eat since i have many other choices in my fridge such as pizza rolls. but not only is it good, but it's actually pretty healthy!

i wonder...?

Why is the sky blue? what does my life look like through other people’s eyes? how come they call it goodbye? how come the good die? is there really god? what really happens when we die? why can’t we all just get along? how come people judge each other so much? how does everything end? will the world really end in 2012? do i end up happy? is there really a happy-ending? why do girls cry over boys who never deserved them in the first place? why do boys treat girls the way they treat them? what is my purpose in life? why are people of all kinds not treated equally? why ca we not just accept one another? why is there so much hatred among us? why is saying “no” so hard to do? what is love? what is happiness? what would it be like if the internet never existed? how would it be like to live back in type? how does space really look like? why are there so much suffering in the world? why can we not help each other, instead of putting each other down? is there another dimension that’s different to the one we are living in now? is there really a god? what is love? is there such thing as impossible? where do babies come from? which is worse, failing or never bothering to try at all? If life is so shirt, then why do we do so many things we don’t like, yet like many thing things we don’t do? when all is said and done, will i have said more than i’ve done? to what degree have i actually controlled the course my life has taken? should i be worried about doing things right, or doing the right things? how come the things that makes me happy don’t make everyone else happy? am i holding onto something that i need to let go of? why take risks? what makes me, me? Is it actually possible to know the truth without challenging it in the first place? do the things we do today even matter tomorrow? what do i have to lose? what really is the difference between being alive and truly living? would you choose someone who completes you, or the one who loves you completely? if we learn from our mistakes, then why are we so afraid of making mistakes? what would i do differently if nobody would actually judge me? what do i want to change in the world? if people evolved from monkeys and apes, then why are there still monkeys and apes? is crying a sign of weakness or strength? should i ask more questions, or just settle for what i only know? if i could do everything all over again, would i have done anything differently? what makes me smile? am i the kind of friend that i would want as a friend? why do we chase after things that we can’t have?why do we do things that are not allowed? why are we born? why is it so difficult to move away from people and things that we really love? how do i know what i know?why do we let go of things we really love?

Where the WILD Things Are.

First of all, what is the exact definition of the word “wild”? The word wild means to live in a state of nature in which one is not tamed or domesticated. It could also mean uncultivated, uninhabited, uncivilized, or barbarous. The term “wild” can be taken in many various ways depending on how people perceive it as.

As for me, wild comes in two different meanings - there is that definition of being uncivilized and not being tamed like some sort of a wild animal or a person living in caves. And then I mostly view the word “wild” where someone is going crazy - or rather acting in a crazy manner. It just really depends on what situation we are talking about...but I am mostly leaning on the latter one.

Although with some little meditations, my true definition of “wild” comes alive. Somehow in my mind, I see people going crazy and are going out of control. When I say crazy and out of control, I don’t really mean people being all psycho and everything; what I mean is that I see people doing crazy things like partying, extreme stunts, etc. All the things that happens at a party is what I would consider wild especially if your young...like sex, drugs, alcohol. Perhaps alcohol and sex is a natural thing for humans and everybody goes through their “fun” stages in their life, when everything revolves around just having a good time, but when these three substances combines, people can be caught up into pretty wild situations. Such situations could be getting arrested for DUIs, violent acts when drunk, unexpected pregnancies, STDs, and obviously getting busted for doing drugs.

When i see the word “wild”, I also think of rebellious people who just really don’t care about anything at all. They do not give a care about the world and the thing that is happening around them unless it involves them. They’re pretty much the type of people who are most likely a trouble maker and ends up doing reckless, wild stunts that we would normally see on the news. Wild stunts could involve crimes like shootings, murder, kidnapping, etc. Or sometimes they are just stunts that would be regarded as complete stupidity and reckless - such an example would be performing a fancy, complicated bike trick and ending up inflicting an injury to oneself or trying to attempt a stunt that is impossible to do, yet still doing so regardless of all the hazardous warning that stunt brings to people.

In contrast of the negative things about the world “wild”, there are also situations in which it is not a negative factor. Being wild does not always necessarily have to be associated or labeled as bad thing. Have you ever heard of the saying, “...let your imaginations run wild..”? Well for me, it also gives me a sense of freedom where I can do anything without having to think about anything else; being able to do something without any limit whatsoever.

Holy crap I'm a SENIOR!

As I get older and get further into my education, I have to admit that there is more of a challenge in each of my classes. Each one of my classes are getting much harder and the amount of work are much greater. However, this kind of challenge and work is somewhat an expected thing. It's just that, I didn't really expect this much work would be ahead of me.

Of all the upperclassmen I've met during my high school years, most of them said that my junior year would prove to be the most difficult one and the one that would count the most since most colleges will tend to look at my junior year the most because of all the hype with HSPA while my senior year will be more of a relaxing year where I don;t have to do as much work as I did the previous year. I believed them.

Now that I'm on my senior year, what I believed were all wrong. Senior year proved to be the toughest one out of all high school years. It required more work and stress. There are just piles of work on top of one another and the due dates does not help either. Most likely, the due dates of my assignments are right next to each other and it's just really hard to keep up. Every assignments are very time consuming, resulting less sleep for me and bringing massive amount of stress. Not only that, college essays and college applications have to be done perfectly in order to give me a sigh of relief and hope that I would be accepted into the school I want to go after high school. It's just really hard to balance things out especially when there are interruptions such as clubs, sports, events at school, and my social life...hey I'm a 17-year-old high school student, give me some slack on the social life part.

I can say that I spend a good amount of time on homework, depending on how hard it is or time I must spend on it. Most likely, I would pay greater attention to an assignment that requires more thinking like a project than simple problems from a workbook or worksheet. I would say that I spend at least 7-8 hours per night on homework, if I don't fall asleep all of a sudden. Most of the time, I try to pull an all-nighter or squeeze in at least 2-3 hours of sleep everyday if I'm lucky. It's been a long time since I last slept a good 7-9 hours.

I've definitely noticed a huge change in the amount of homework being assigned. Like I mentioned before, as I get further in my education, the more I see myself facing greater challenges. It just gets harder and harder every year. But perhaps the reason why there is a big change in the amount of homework is because we have advanced greatly as a society in terms of technology and knowledge. There are more things for us students to educationally cover.

I would be lying if I said that I don't learn anything when I'm doing my homework because I actually do. The things that sometimes don't understand in class, I tend to understand later on while doing my homework. When it comes to describing myself as a student, I think I'm in between those students who do homework right away as soon as they're assigned and procrastinating..I have to admit that I procrastinate a lot and I get distracted easily.

Leave Me Alone!

I've always valued my alone time just as much as when I am surrounded with people. I love being with people, I love surrounding myself with the people I love and care about. However, I also keep a certain limit as to how much time I give to people and to myself. I am the type of person who keeps that balance between being with people and giving time to myself. To me, hanging out with my family and friends is the time for me to just spend some qulaity time with them and have a fun time. Being with them helps me forget the problems that hovers around me and lets me release stress.

At the same time, I like the idea of being by being alone. There are times where I would prefer to isolate myself from everything and everyone. I never minded being alone. I know there are those who cannot stand a single second being alone and are afraid to be alone - maybe because they don’t want  to be perceived as being a lonely individual by other people or perhaps they have other reasons for not wanting to be alone. But as for me, I enjoy my time being alone and don't mind being by myself. An ideal alone time for me would be in my room or just sitting or lying down at a serene place. For me, it’s sort of relaxing. I like the quiet atmosphere when im alone. It gives me that special time to think about different things, like a self-reflection time for me. I could just close my eyes and dream. It's a way for me to get out of reality, especially when my reality is at its worst.

At this point in my life, I am dying to have some alone time for myself. There is just so much chaos going on and I feel like i cannot breathe. All I really need is to take a breather and just sit down for awhile and think about certain things - about what I really want in my life, doing things that will make me happy, who am I really as a person...personal things. That’s all I really need and want in my life as of right now.

Like I have mentioned before, i don't really do much when I'm alone. My ideal atmosphere when im alone is just sitting or lying down at a serene place, whether it may be in my room or somewhere else, while listening to mellow, slow songs. I have always loved the peacefulness being alone brings. Also, I can be just myself, my very own persona. It’s a time for me to release all the emotions I refuse for others to see. When something troubles me and I feel like crying, I usually control it since I hate it when people see me cry. That is when I love being alone the most, I can just let all my emotions and frustrations out.

Music is Universal.

If you were to ask me how important is music to my life my answer would probably be this: Words cannot describe how important music is to my life. It’s everything to me and perhaps most of my life revolve around it. It’s quite ignorant of those who consider music as a background noise. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who could possibly hate music. To me, music brings different feeling and mood to my life. It may sound kind of cliche, but music gives color to my life. in a way, music let’s me connect to my inner soul...something deep within me.

Music brings this whole emotion into my life. There are times where it may seem that my world has fallen and I have hit rock bottom, in which I feel like there is no one who I can confide to. I tend to put on my own music and somehow, just hearing the melodies and the lyrics always makes me feel a lot better than before. I don’t know how I would survive without music. Everywhere I go, my ipod has to go with me. I can’t go anywhere without my ipod in my purse. If I were given a choice to choose between my phone and my ipod, I think I would end up choosing my ipod in the end. And whenever I would go on road-trips, I wouldn’t be able to last an hour without my songs...of course, there’s always the radio, but the songs can get repetitive and I always end up hating the songs that are constantly being played on the radio. I prefer my own music.

Music is important to me because...well, would it be easy enough to understand how important music is to me if I say I’m just a natural music lover? I think that says it all right?

Music tends to stir something inside me almost all the time I hear a tune; whether it may be a fun-loving track that would make me want to stand up and dance, a catchy tune that makes me want to sing along, or just simply a mellow song that will make want to lie on the ground and think about deep things. Somehow, it never fails to thrill me inside.

The types of music that gives me inspirations are the types that has can connect to my own personal experiences, the kinds that leaves me thinking and wondering. Meanwhile, there are those kind of songs that leaves me cold such as sad music, Though, I prefer mellow songs over hyped up, upbeat tunes; mellow songs makes me cold...but I guess that’s the reason why sad songs are called “sad”.

Music is universal. That is my motto when it comes to music. I don’t really pay discriminate music by their genres or languages. If I happen to like a song that is in a different genre than what I normally listen to, or it’s in a different language; I will listen to it. If I like a song, I like. PERIOD. If you were to take a glance of my playlists on my ipod, you would notice that it is a mixture of different genres of music: from hip-hop/rap, techno, pop, rock, electronic, house, and of course indie. You would also notice that there are some songs that are in different languages such as English, Spanish, Filipino, Korean, Japanese, French, Italian, etc. I just love music and I don’t stick to one particular type of music. Sure, I prefer a certain genre of music over another (I’m mostly an Indie lover) but I like to go out of my Indie circle and find other good music. Just as long the songs contains some meaning...

Hello?...Are You There?

Over time, the world has advanced greatly - both socially and technology. I can't even put into words how huge technology is in  many people's lives and how it helps connect people all together. It would

be rather hard for us to do our everyday chores and live in a certain comfort. One of the biggest technological advancement humans have made was the invention of the cellphone. The cellphone is one of the reasons, along with computers and the internet, as to why the world is so closely connected with one another. It would be quite difficult if we were to live without it...even just thinking how the world would work if the cellphone was never invented at all. Of course, I am not implying that we should revolve our whole world into such a small device that would be replaced every now and then for a much newer and slicker device. And once again, it is only a phone after all. Some of us may keep a phone in their pockets all the time: every hour, every minute, every second of the day. They are constantly on it whether it may be talking, texting, or video chatting through it - even to the extend where they are talking to their friends through it when they're right next to each other. Meanwhile, some can function normally without having it by them at, well...not with them all the time. They don't go crazy if it's not in their hands.

As for me, I would say I'm right in the middle of these two spectrums. I can function fine and normally as a normal human being without it. I get to do things without it. Sometimes, I prefer not having it near me because I get to take a breather from everything and from the fast way of society. If I have a problem, I choose to turn off my phone and focus on something different. There's always a time in my day where don't have my phone with me at all and I'm fine without it.

If phones were never invented or if the entire phone network collapsed for sic months, I don't think I would be able to do things the way I normally would do them such as do my homework - yes it's possible -, go online, and be updated to what's new. It would be very hard to connect through other people and meet new people. Cellphone has always provided us humans with such things. And to wonder how life would be like without it, is quite unimaginable. 

Although, there is also a positive thing about it never being invented or having the phone network collapse for six months. Gossips and bullying would cease to exist. We would have more time for things and would be able to see things differently in ways that we would have never thought we would be able to see when we had our eyes locked into our phone screens the whole time.

Hotwheels.

There are many things that I notice about other drivers whether I’m sitting in the car as a passenger or it's me sitting on the driver’s seat - or even just watching people drive in front of my house while I sit on my front porch. The things I notice about people driving cars depends on many variables such as their facial expressions while driving. That’s probably the most obvious thing as well as the first thing i notice about other drivers. Facial expressions can give you so much things about a driver - it can tell you if they’re pissed off or happy, if they’re tired or wide awake; but sometimes you just can’t tell at all. I also notice the outfit that they’re wearing, somehow I can tell whether or not they are going somewhere very important; perhaps going to work or even just driving to the nearest store to do some errands. I know it’s pretty weird how I tend to notice these things...

Believe it or not, there are some real differences between drivers. It may seem as if there are not any differences at all, but there are...even in the smallest possible way. We all drive differently and have different habits when we drive. There are those who drive like maniacs, as if they’re a bunch of animals that have been just released from a cage running around after being locked up for a very long time. I tend to call those drivers a-holes...perhaps I shouldn’t use such profanity in an English assignment, so let’s just call them jerks. And yet, there are those who are safe, cautious drivers. Oh and let us not forget those drivers that driver very slowly, which is kind of irritating most of the time especially when you are in a hurry.

As a driver my self, I have seen other drivers do crazy and dangerous things. And no lie, I have done some crazy things while driving; however, I haven’t had the guts to do some extremely dangerous things like racing on the road at midnight. There are those who are driving while intoxicated or are under illegal substances (this is what I would call stupidity in my opinion).  I’ve seen people do that before and I refuse to do the same. Like what I was saying, I have done some crazy things. But I like to call them bad habits. One of the things I do plenty of times, and I know I’m not the only one, is texting or talking on the phone while driving. Temptation kills...and not answering the phone when someone is calling or when you’ve just received a message, it’s pretty tempting. But I think I’ve gotten better with such temptations as time passes by.

You could see into a person’s personality by just the way they drive; of course, it may not tell you many things, but there are things that you can pick out from just the way a person drives. An example would be a driver who speed drives on a sub-divisional road (going 45 mph on a 25mph) while his engine roars by. I can tell that that person loves to show off in front of people and thinks that he’s a big shot.

Just as you may though that you already know a person well by just watching them drive; the next thing you know, your judgement has deceived you. There are definitely those drivers that act totally different when they’re behind the wheel and when they’re not. The jerk that cut you while driving might turn out to be the nicest person you have ever met. You can’t fully judge a person and their personalities by just the way they drive.

So far, I have been fortunate enough to not be involved in a car accident...and let’s just hope that it stays that way for the rest of my driving career.

Obviously, I’d want to be the type of driver that never gets into car accidents and is a defensive driver. Someone who can react quickly when something goes wrong on the road. I’ve had my few shares of close calls and thank god for my fast reactions. The models that I’d want to follow would be my dad because he’s a very cautious driver especially when he knows that his family is in the car.

Anger Management...?

Well, there are many things that angers me. Whenever I'm feeling really crappy; when things are not going the way I want or hope them to be, I tend to get angry even with the smallest things...trust me, I do. When a person is talking to me and I'm pissed, I either get pissed by it or i just ignore them without even meaning to do so. I know it's bad, but it's just that I don't really have the patience or even the energy to acknowledge them because all my energy is being worn out by my anger.

I would say that when it comes to controlling my anger, it's a 50/50 chance that I would be able to control it. Although, my ability to be able to control my anger depends on how angry I really am. I wouldn't necessarily explode all of a sudden on someone or something that easily. I would say that a person must have done something very wrong to me to make me explode on them. When I try to control my anger, I usually just close my eyes and breathe deeply...I guess you could consider that strategy as meditation. It usually help me calm my mind. Also when I'm at home, I like to go to my room and isolate myself from everyone and everything. I like to scream into my pillow and punch it. It helps me release all that steam that I've been keeping from the inside. It actually feels very refreshing after I do that and I think it's much better to do that than to release your anger to a person that has done nothing to you.

I would definitely be lying if I said that I've never exploded or "lost it" before because in all reality, I have “lost it” several times before. And when I do, I just black out; it’s like a totally different person comes out of me. There are things that I have said or done that I never want to happen. I lose that self-control. I don’t have control over me or the things that I say or do. Hurtful words and comments are said to that other person whenever I explode.

After such an outburst, there are many feelings that hover around me and it depends on whether who is at fault. Obviously, when someone had done such a nasty thing to me or if they were the one who started a fight with me, bursting into anger towards them makes me feel relieved. But if it is my own fault and that person that I exploded to was just trying to help me, of course I would feel very guilty and ashamed of what I've done to them. In the back of my head, i know that they cause no harm and just wanted to help. And that’s usually the reason why I would feel guilty and ashamed of what I've done to them. I never wanted things like that to happen in the first place.

Finally, to those who needs help controlling their anger, all I can really say is things that helps you calm down. Breathe deeply, close your eyes and think of things that would keep your mind away from the things that make you angry. It’s better to take your anger out on an object rather than take it out on a person. Violence is not the answer to anger...

Friends...Quality over Quantity.

Having friends is a huge part in everyone's lives. It’s what makes every single person in this world special and it’s just how we are. We love making friends and having friends by us. I don't think anyone can manage to live without having at least that single friend that you can definitely count on. People have different ways of making friends and there are most certainly different groups of friends everywhere. Even by just looking around our surroundings, you’ll see many varieties of friends - large and small. But regardless of the amount, I believe that it’s better to have a small amount of friends, but friends who you can definitely trust; rather than have a huge group of friends, but feels very fake.

It’s also important to have a many friends that surrounds you. BUT being able to choose your friends wisely is the most important thing. Which one would you rather have? A single friend that has been there by your side when your on the top of the world and even when you think you have hit rock bottom; or a bunch of fake people who are pretending to be your friend when your facing them, but the very moment that you turn around, they just stab you right in your back. If I was to choose, I’d pick having a single friend no doubt about it. In addition, I’m the type of person who isn’t really a loner, but at the same time, I’m not really friends with a lot of people. I choose my friends very carefully. Me having to choose friends carefully is far different to what someone would say being judgmental. I’ll be honest, I have my first impressions of people and I’d be a total hypocrite if I say that I don’t judge or say that I always get good impressions of people because in reality, it’s the opposite. Although, everyone starts of with a clean slate in my book. If they’re not doing anything wrong to me or are not bother me, then why should I have a reason to not like them. I like to give everyone a chance. The people that you least expect to come to your life are the ones that make a huge impact to you.

I remember an upperclassman, ring my freshman year, told me how you get to find who your real friends are when your in your junior/senior year. And now that I’m in my senior year, I found that advise to be very true. When I was in around in 8th grade and around freshman/beginning of sophomore year, I tried to fit in with the crowds. I tried to be friends with people that I knew in the back of my mind, are not what I’d consider as real friends. I tried to be “popular” …I tried doing what the rest of the other “popular” kids were doing and well it didn’t quite turn out right. The more I tried to be with those big crowds, the more I started losing my sense of individualism; the more I became acquired to the term of “fakeness”. I wasn’t who I wanted to be. As the days passed on, I became friends with other people, not because they were what people see as “popular” or the “coolest kids in school”, but because of their personality. I felt like as if I fit right in like a piece of a jigsaw puzzle.

I know many people who have a huge group of friends and also those who have a close knitted circle of friends. And based on what I have seen, there seems to be no difference when it comes to happiness whether a person has many friends or few friends. But what I’ve noticed is that one is closer than the other. It also depends whether you’re being true to yourself. If you are one of those people who chooses to change who you are just to be friends and just to be accepted by a group of people, then you’re just wasting your time changing for other people. Be true to who you are and there’ll always be people who will befriend you and see through who you really are instead of the things you do or have. Friends come and go, but it’s those who stays that are your real friends.

There are those who accumulate many friends because they feel lonely or can’t function right by themselves. They’re scared of being individualists and think that if they are not seen with a lot of people, others will think as if they’re a loser. Peer pressure also comes into play. But having many friends doesn’t always mean that you’re scare to be an individual, it also maybe because you have a personality that everyone likes and people just love to be around you. Meanwhile, there are also those who focuses on just one or two friends particularly because they are he/she’s closest friends. There are some who probably wished they have many friends, but people just haven’t seen who they really are. They might also have a different viewpoint of having friends. Not everyone is going to be very confident, there are those who are shy and tend to keep to themselves - having only a few amount of friends. But the most important thing is that we are happy with the people who we consider as friends.